Bloody Night
by Ichimaru Kenji
Summary: So fast. Did it happen too fast? If not. Why am I here? Why must I be the Loser. I thought we won. How was I suppose to know it would backfire on me? [harryXdraco]
1. How it all started

_No, Harry Potter nor any character here belongs to me. _

Bloody night.

Chapter 1. How it all started.

It was late night at the Gryffindor dormitory. Harry rolled around side to side as he tried to get comfortable and sleep. After minutes he threw aside his blanket and sat up. Looked at his watch, which read 1:32am. He sighed again, he realized he was sighing too much these days. The dark haired boy went downstairs clutching his invisibility cloak and the Marauder's Map. He looked down at the map to see, surprisingly, Malfoy in the bathroom just sitting on the floor. He pulled a disgusted face and thought to himself, who would want to sit in a bathroom's floor….

Either ways he was getting a bit curious and thought that he might be sleeping in the toilet and decided to try get a picture of that and blow it up and put around the castle along with the Christmas decoration. He sniggered to himself for coming up with such a brilliant plan.

As he slipped on his special cloak, he headed towards the 2nd floor male toilet. As he opened the toilet entrance door, he found the silver blond hair boy sitting on the floor with his back to Harry with blood trickling down his wrist and hand, making a small puddle around his hand on the white marble floor. He stared in horror, not wanting to know why he was in this condition. He tried fading back outside the toilet but he felt the cloak being pulled off.

"What are you here for, Potter?" asks Malfoy in a very faint voice, still not facing Harry.

"I…I just wanted to use the toilet" replies Harry in a rush, saying the first excuse which came to him.

"Then use it quickly and get out" a sly voice replies.

"But there's blood on your hand..." he says in a much quieter voice, hardly audible.

He laughed out loud "Since when did you care for a Slytherin guy, huh Potter?"

"What are you doing here anyway?" changing the subject abruptly.

"DIDN'T YOU FUCKING HEAR ME!? GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!" He screamed. Tears were rolling down his cheeks uncontrollably, 'thank god Potter can't see my face' thought Malfoy.

"I heard you had a _good_ night with Zambini, is that true?" Harry asks. When no reply came, he continued "Heard that your family's really pissed at their son" smirks Harry.

"What do you know?" a quiet reply came out, then he burst "WHAT DO YOU KNOW? DO YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE IGNORED BY YOUR OWN FAMILY AND HAVING YOUR DAD JUST SHOUT AT YOU NEVER TO SET A FOOT IN THE MANOR ANYMORE!! DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH IT HURTS?"

Harry stood there dumbfound, of course not being able to swallow in the pain in Draco. He just knelt down behind him and gently placed his head on his shoulder blabbering stuff which came to his head "I'm sorry, I didn't know, I'm such an idiot…"

Malfoy laughed at this and whispered back quietly "Just noticed, huh?"

Harry seemed to just suddenly snap up, and can't believe how his body just moved on its own, and the fact that he was comforting his enemy was more unbelievable. But somehow, without clear reasons, he felt the coldness of the Slytherin's neck after all that shouting and found himself unable to resist himself, and planted a quick kiss on his neck before burying his nose once again into the shoulders.

Malfoy blushed furiously; he didn't know how to deal with this. This time it was different, it wasn't like with Zambini, he wasn't forced to do anything. Without really thinking of what he was going to do, he turned around and snuggled his face in Harry's chest, warmth was flooding through his cold body.

Harry was surprised at the coldness off the boys body, he looked down at the blood oozing wrist, he lifted the wrist every so gently, and licked the blood off the hand and licked the wound which was beginning to heal. The blood, tasted so metallic and warm, his eye lids drooped as he realized that he may never know entirely how Draco must have felt being a family's disgrace.

Harry lifted the blonde's face towards his, and pushed his tongue into the other's mouth, feeling his warmth, he began licking the contours of Draco's mouth, he felt him slink his arms around his neck. They parted, then looked into each other's eyes, a scarlet blush crept on their faces, they looked away, embarrassed, ashamed, confused.

It was Harry first to react, he stood up, coughed and tried to soothe himself down and tried to act as if nothing had happened, but was failing miserably. He avoided looking at Malfoy's as if he was some deadly Must-Not-Look-Or-You-Will-Die creature, he knew Malfoy was still sitting crumpled on the floor somewhere like one and a bit meter behind him, Harry's mind wandered off for a while thinking of all sorts of random things such as how he could mentally navigate people like he could feel their presence…etc…etc…etc. Before he knew what he was doing he found out that his legs had carried him onto his bed, he couldn't remember walking out of the toilet and going through the portrait and walking upstairs into his dorm. He shook off these feeling and worries and drifted off to sleep, and somehow he didn't think about what happened in the bathroom even once that night.

The next morning Harry woke by Ron's jerking off his duvet off him, he quickly dressed and accompanied Ron to the great hall, where they found seats quite easily and began filling their plates with sausage, ham, mash potato and toast. He suddenly noticed that he hadn't said anything to Ron since yesterday when they talked about………… this was beginning to get awfully weird, Harry couldn't remember clearly what they talked about, or what happened yesterday. He shook his head and turned his head in his best friend's direction, to see he hasn't touched his breakfast yet, instead he was staring at Zambini. Harry getting strangely impatient shook Ron's shoulder violently and glared at him, Ron being flabbergasted at this sudden action turned and started at Harry with a --What?? --dumbfounded look.

"What?!"

"Ron!! What are you doing?! I mean, did something happen? I mean, did something happen yesterday? More like, why haven't we talked at all yet?"

"Huh- - - - - - -??? Oh right, yea, sorry, I just, you know, you know……… you know, I just kinda drifted off, that's all, you know, thinking about Fred and Georges fake wands and BLOODY HELL!!! Harry!!"

Harry at this point shocked by the sudden shouting of Ron, tried to think what he might say next, maybe he's gonna say what happened yesterday, or something. Unfortunately, taking so long thinking Ron began talking again, but this time in a quiet tone.

"Harry!!- - What happened?! I mean bloody hell, you got dried blood on your hands and your robe and even on your lips, man!! Seriously what happened?!- - Harry?!?! Are you listening to me? You seem to be also drifting off- - - - - - - - - - - - - ………."

His heart clenched and wouldn't let go, he couldn't explain this feeling, so painful and dark, why?! He suddenly got flash backs of what happened last night, he realized he just left Malfoy there, why?! Why was he so dumb?! Why didn't he even think about him, his crying face, his metallic blood, his cold body? He looked down onto his hands, his enemy's blood blotched onto his hand, - - enemy- - was Malfoy really his enemy? After what happened last night? He looked around the hall, trying to find the platinum blond hair on the far side of the hall, he couldn't see any. He turned back in front, not being able to understand nor control this weird unexplainable feeling troubled him deeply, he muttered "Sorry, stomach ache" to Ron and hurried off to the 2nd floor male toilet, but what he found disappointed him, there was nothing there, not even traces of blood.

Harry shook his head, 'was it a dream? An illusion? A wish? A WISH?! Man, how did that get in my head?! But there's nothing… maybe he cleaned it up… but no way he looked to pale yesterday… but even he, wouldn't want rumors starting…' the debate inside Harry's head continued for 10 minuets or so. He shook his head one last time and headed back towards the Gryffindor's common room, walking through the almost deserted castle gave him the chills even though it was still in the morning, but compared to spending the Christmas holidays with the Dursleys' this was paradise.

He plumped himself down on the comfy arm chair and stared at this fire, reminiscing what happened last night, going over them like an old movie film inside his brain.

Plop……………. Plop……………… Plop

Harry came back to his senses to realize tears were running down his cheeks onto his fisted palms, he quickly wiped them away, looking around to see if anyone had seen him - - Safe - -

He looked outside and saw it was getting dark, another day he thought, another day, another day where he could do nothing but think of that incident, of their touch, their kiss, his cold body. He walked up the stairs and was about to open the door to his dorm when he froze. Inside the room were two people's voices.

"So how long are you planning to stay here for?" said Ron's voice.

"Hmmmmm…. Until you tell me to go" said another voice which Harry could have sworn he heard before.

"-cough- wonder what Harry would say…?"

"Who cares what that bastard would think? Hey, shhhhhh…….."

"HEY stop it, what are you doing?!"

"Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh………."

Harry suddenly recognized the 2nd person's voice.

Harry barged inside the room, not believing what he heard or what he was seeing, inside was Malfoy unbutton Ron's shirt, Ron's eye went wide pushing Malfoy aside trying to close his gapping mouth. Draco sneered and pushed past frozen Harry.

Harry ran back to chase Draco, 'what's was happening to me? What was this feeling? Why does it hurt so much?' He grabbed Draco's arm and pushed him into an unused classroom.

"Oww… Don't need to be so rough, Potter" said Draco with a dead sarcastic tone.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"----Silence----"

"WHAT DO U FUCKING WANT ME TO DO?!" Shouted Harry, causing Draco to jump from the sudden rise of volume.

"To forget about that night" Draco replied in a quiet voice, looking away.

"What?! I mean why??"

"Does it matter?..."

"Fine, you want me to forget about what happened? Ok" Sneered Harry, who was becoming really irritated by this whole conversation. He was about to leave when he was pulled backwards roughly, and slammed on the wall creating clouds of thick dust to float around them.

Malfoy sneered, with a clear look of amusement on his face.

"You wanna know why, Potter?"

"- -silence- - ………yea" Harry replied in a quiet voice.

"It's because it didn't mean anything, Potter Boy!"

"How can you say that?" Harry replied quickly, to only realize seconds later how pathetic that sounded.

"sigh BECAUSE it dosent mean anyyyything, I can SAYYYYY that it dosent mean anything" said Malfoy in a slooooooow –oh-my-god kind of voice.

"It does" came a really quiet voice.

"maybe, maybe not"

------silence------

"Then enlighten me Golden Boy, what could anything we did yesterday mean SOMETHING?"

"It could mean that I care for you…"

"Hmmmm………. Sorry, but I don't accept pity from people, I'm not a Hupelpuff.

Malfoy looked down, and then side ways –right-and-left, but never did he look in front. He sighed again. And finally looked up to Harry's face. He took a deep breath and said "Hey, umm…. Nice weather we're having tonight…yea…"

Harry was not impressed. "What – The – Fuck – Did –You –Say?!?!!?"

"Hmm…….." came a nervous reply. "Hey, you know it's like 1:00 now so; you should go back to your dorm…"

"And your point is….?" Came a slooow steady reply.

"…Stop asking me questions!" came a still quiet but an angry reply.

Harry took in a deep breath and sighed. He moved closer to Malfoy, watching him retreat a bit backwards, he then ever so gently slipped his arm around his 'enemy's' waist. Malfoy gasped, he wasn't expecting such bold movements, he looked up trying to find the emerald eyes for answers, but found them obscured by eyelids. He then also gripped the back of the boy in front of him, not so hard, tight enough so that he could actually rest his arm by clinging on to Harry's shirt.

How long they stayed in that position was not clear. Only when Harry woke up by the sound of thousands of foot steps did he actually relies he was now on the floor sitting with the platinum head guy between his-folded-up-legs-to-the-chest still clinging on to him in his sleep. He smiled, in what seemed like ages since he once smiled truly from the heart. He shook Malfoy in order to wake him up. "Hey, time to wake up, unless you're planning to skive all day"


	2. Just Reminiscing

_4 years ago. Malfoy Mansion. Christmas Night._

"_Dad, I'm sorry, I'll do better next year!"_

"_YOU ALWAYS SAY THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AGAIN! And now look! Your grades are same as ever, you are a pathetic piece of shit! No wonder you can't even get a decent grade! Look at yourself! YOU FREAK OF NATURE!"_

_Imagine the scene, a young man cowering in a dark corner tears running down his pale face, puffy red eyes, red purple scorches and scars on his pale body. While a tall man with long silver hair stand over him._

_On new years day, of the same year. _

'_What's the meaning of living? Is this how God shows his love to his people, by letting them suffer? I had enough. I don't want anything. Anything but eternal blackness.' The phrase went around and around Draco's mind all day. No, all his life maybe. He wanted to be strong, strong for his father, strong for his family, strong for himself. But there was a wall preventing him from achieving that goal._

_He remembers when he was still a tiny kid of the age of five, when he was in the playground playing with other tiny infants; the class clown stood in front and began telling jokes. One, even to this day he remembers, it was the only joke he didn't laugh at. The joke was this._

"_What do you see when you look in the mirror??" The class clown shouted._

_One girl shouted back "Yourself!!!!"_

_The class clown laughed hard, and replied "NO!!! When you look in the mirror you see THE MIRROR!!!!"_

_Everyone laughed at this joke. Except he. _

_He thought for a second. _

_And now, he thinks again. He stared at his own reflection on the mirror, but he didn't see the mirror, all he saw was a frail, weak, pathetic, gaunt body in front of him. He closed his eyes, hoping when he next opened them he will see something different, someone who shone bravely, and someone who stood proud, someone who could actually smile for real. _

_As much as he didn't want to admit it, he himself was the only wall standing in front of his goal. Ironic, eh? _

_He dug into his pocket, and reached for the smooth metallic metal, and he stabbed. It was becoming sort of a habit. He didn't like the ordinary plan, razor on wrist. It was too much of a cliché. And he needed something with more pain. Stabbing. He felt something cold running down his spine. He loved this feeling. It felt so alive, so divine. _

Draco woke up suddenly, to find himself breathing heavily. He looked around, and found himself face to face with Potter. He was smiling.

"How you feeling, Draco?"

"Me? I'm fine" He replied with a quick answer. The memories of that year came flooding back to him. That year was special. That year was special in many ways. That year was when he found out something he should never have found out. Something which made him feel so transparent.

"Are you sure? You seem kinda shaky? Anyway, wanna grab breakfast?"

"….yea sure, actually no, I'm kinda full" His voice gave off no expressions, and so did his face. He just stared at the ground.

Harry thinking he was just nervous, stood up and left saying "We have potions first, better hurry up!" And ran to hall.

Draco left in silence stayed crossed legged on the floor. He bit his lips. He looked at his arm. Now it was just pale. No scars. He knew there wouldn't be, what only remained in him a flash back of what his life was like previous years ago. He breathed heavily. Suddenly he realized why he was here in the first place. But he tossed it aside, thinking 'Not now, that can wait, I've got more important stuff to think about'

When it came to love, he didn't really have a clue. It wasn't as though he wasn't taught the whole process of sex and stuff. It was the emotional stuff, he didn't understand. No one explained to him. But he did remember his mom saying to him how love makes one stronger. That is why. That is why Draco forced himself to fall in love.

Forced. No he thought, 'Forced is a strong word, more like lead himself to fall in love'

It wasn't as though he chose Potter because he was conveniently there; it was because Potter was what he wanted to see three years ago in the mirror reflection. Someone who was not like him. 'So what happens now?' He asked himself, hoping his brain would answer back, but to no avail.

Just then he heard the bell ring, signalizing the first lesson to start Potions. He ignored it and shifted his position to have his legs stretched out ('more relaxing' he thought)

He sat there. Staring at the dusty walls. Wanting time to freeze. Wanting time to shudder to a halt. Everything hanging in freeze frame. He wonders what his next step is, since he confessed to Harry that he 'loved' him. He congratulated himself for his plan to work. Either Harry was pretty thick or he was just clever! He began wondering if he really fell for it. 'Fell for it' it didn't seem right. More like believed it, sounds better.

It be frank, Draco actually planned this whole play two weeks ago. No maybe, years ago, maybe from that New Years Day. He closed his eyes, reminiscing more. Letting everything flood back into him. He knew he shouldn't flinch when something bad flashed past his brain, for flinching at them would have meant that he didn't accept what happened. And to become strong, you first had to accept your past, to change your future.


End file.
